Know Your Students – Engaging the Students

Much has been said about the need to reach out to young people, particularly students. We've seen countless discussions, sessions, and talks emphasizing the importance of addressing their needs. Many graduates and elders are eager to contribute their resources to connect with these students. But beyond simply reaching out, there is an even greater need for mentorship. However, are we genuinely taking effective steps to engage and mentor the young people we so often talk about?

Students feel lost, confused

Many students feel lost, even while in college performing well in their academic works, or regularly attending fellowship. Despite appearing engaged, many of these "regular" students still feel disconnected from their purpose. Many are unsure if they even enjoy their studies, and some have no clear vision for their future. Many of them are living their lives without goals – like playing football without goal posts. “I don’t know” is their response when asked about their goals and visions. They seek meaning and purpose—they are crying out from within. Are we truly committed to reaching these students in a meaningful way?

Many students who regularly attend church and fellowship admit to being inconsistent in their engagement with Scripture and prayer. Outwardly, they appear sincere, but deep down, they are yearning for a more meaningful life. They are attending fellowships and church only for attendance and for fear of consequences, not because they truly want it. They appear to be charm and enjoyable yet lost their sense of purpose and meaning in fellowships and church activities.

Many feel lost, caught up in worldly lifestyles and addicted to online fantasies and games, which only deepen their sense of dissatisfaction. As the pace of technological advancement accelerates, young people become increasingly captivated by new trends, often swept along by the current without clear direction. They are going as the wind blows them, and if they are not taken care we don't know where they are heading. Are we not simply impressed by their show of smartness and good looking life without knowing them well?

Additionally, many admit to facing significant peer pressure that leads them to engage in unwanted activities, despite their active involvement in church and fellowships. They are struggling with internal battles and personal challenges that they do not feel comfortable discussing openly with others.  One of the greatest obstacles and challenges these teenagers face on a daily basis is the immense pressure exerted by their peers – some have even confessed to being blackmailed or coerced into participating in activities that they find undesirable and morally objectionable.

Though they need help, many are unaware of this need and find themselves in quiet desperation. Even among active fellowship members, some resist support—not because they don't need it, but because they may not recognize their own struggles. It’s heart-breaking to see members of our fellowships, those we thought were grounded, actually feeling lost. But can we really blame them?

Home, a place of inspiration and brokenness

No doubt, inspiration for life comes from anywhere. When asked who or what inspires them, students don’t typically mention celebrities, preachers, or teachers. Instead, their greatest inspiration often comes from their parents and family members. Home is where we first learn to live a meaningful life, and for many students — and everyone in general — there’s a deep desire to see a home filled with love and contentment. Hardworking parents and supportive siblings become sources of inspiration, and many young people long for the happiness of their home.

Sadly, many come from broken homes, where they may have a parent or siblings struggling with alcoholism or dealing with separation. In these cases, students often search for someone who understands their struggles. Yet, the world outside their home is preoccupied with its own concerns.  Spiritual teachers and mentors sometimes overlook the hidden lives of students, often focusing on their attendance at church and fellowship without understanding the personal battles they face. These struggles can erode their self-esteem, lead to identity crises, and trigger emotional breakdowns.

According to the Bible, the primary place of spiritual training is not the church, but the home (Deut. 6:4-9). Those people whose families shape their spiritual lives perform their lives better outside the home. Just as family is a source of inspiration, it also shapes their character and values. In a context like ours, family holds an inescapable influence over young people, for better or worse. Tim McKnight suggests that we must first nurture and support families if we wish to effectively guide young people. Perhaps this means we should extend our mentorship to family members as well. And if that’s the case, are we truly willing to take this step?

Still some claim that no one inspires them. Perhaps they fail to approach others with an open mind to find inspiration, or there truly are no role models that resonate with their specific interests and goals. These people may feel disillusioned or unmotivated, struggling to identify inspiring figures or sources that align with their unique aspirations. It could be that they have not yet discovered the right communities or outlets that could provide the inspiration they seek, or they may have faced disappointments or setbacks that have dampened their ability to find inspiration in others.

Students have potentials – as history says

History has recorded how powerfully students have shaped the spiritual awakenings in the world. In the 1940s and 1950s, movements like Youth for Christ (YFC) have engaged students with the gospel, organized big youth rallies in cities, involving celebrities, athletes, and musicians to communicate the gospel with teenagers. Billy Graham was part of the movement as one of their preachers.

The Jesus Movement of the late 1960s and early 1970s touched a significant number of Baby Boomers. Hippies turned to Christ and baptized their music, resulting in the revolution known as contemporary Christian music (CCM); college revivals took hold in places like Asbury in 1970 which continued to this day; through youth musicals and Explo ’72 in Dallas, Texas, churches began to see more young faces; seminaries witnessed a huge influx of students. The Jesus Movement touched a generation of evangelicals. Today, many leaders among various denominational and parachurch groups are at some level products of the Jesus Movement. Movements like UESI and IFES have made significant contributions to the spiritual lives of the students across the nation and the globe which continued to this day.

All these movements contributed to the transformation of students were the initiatives of the students themselves. While we have much work to do in the lives of students, we can be encouraged by these bright spots in students' movements. This is the way forward to our future. If we want to take our young students to the next level and set them upon biblical foundations, we must also focus on parents, adult leaders, the church as a whole, and having a kingdom or missional vision for our students, our communities, and the nations.

The young students have the vast potential to build and strengthen our communities, shaping our collective future. They are quick thinkers who easily find innovative solutions to complex problems. These young people possess the confident mind-set to dream big, boundless aspirations, and the natural ability to effectively engage and inspire their peers. With proper guidance, mentorship, and investment, we have immense hope for rapid, transformative growth in our communities and churches. These extraordinary young people have immeasurable potential, but they need proper, right guidance and support. If we are willing to help them, we have promising future in ministries and communities.

Mentoring – the way to engage and help these broken students

In general,  mentoring is a collaborative relationship between a more experienced person, the mentor, and a less experienced person, the mentee, that helps the mentee develop their skills, knowledge, and understanding. Christian mentoring is a relationship where a more mature believer guides and supports another in their spiritual journey, helping them grow in faith and live according to God's Word. In other words, Christian mentoring is a dynamic, intentional relationship of trust in which one person enables another to maximize the grace of God in their life and service.

Mentoring can be seen in the relationship between Paul and Timothy, where Paul provided guidance, encouragement, and correction. In Titus 2:3-5, older women are instructed to mentor younger women, showing how this practice fosters community and spiritual maturity.

In essence, Christian mentoring is about building relationships that reflect Christ's love and truth, encouraging accountability, and helping one another fulfil God's calling in our lives. In other words, as Colossians 1:28  says, mentoring is proclaiming, admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom, so that everyone may be made fully mature in Christ.

It is essential to understand that mentorship is not a one time event or occasional but a life long commitment between the two to encourage and help each to grow in faith. Oftentimes, mentoring is seen as a one-time event, monthly or yearly event which doesn't have lasting outcome in the lives of the mentees.

Can anyone be a mentor?

While it is possible for anyone to encourage another person, it is essential that to be a mentor, one need to have basic requirements so to hep the mentees effectively.

1. Spiritual Maturity: A mentor should have a strong and active relationship with God. This is reflected in their understanding of Scripture and their ability to apply it to life. As Hebrews 5:12-14 emphasizes, they should be able to teach and discern good from evil.

2. Integrity and Character: A mentor should demonstrate Christ-like qualities such as honesty, humility, and love. Proverbs 27:17 states, "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." This means they should inspire the mentees to grow in their faith as much as the mentors are growing.

3. Empathy and Listening Skills: A good mentor should be able to listen and understand the students' struggles and joys. James 1:19 encourages us to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, which is essential in a mentoring relationship.

4. Availability and Commitment: The mentor should be willing to invest time in the spiritual growth of the students over a long period of time, as seen in the relationship between Paul and Timothy, where Paul was committed to Timothy's well being till his death.

In essence, a mentor must be as willing to grow spiritually as the mentee. Spiritual mentorship requires wisdom, effort, power, and an ongoing journey. Unfortunately, many graduates and elders lack these crucial qualities. Yet, if we are to effectively mentor students, we must be willing to dedicate time to our own spiritual growth, rather than making excuses for our weaknesses. Can we be willing to dedicate time and effort for ourselves to grow?

The Needs -

The students face countless needs that deserve our attention. The younger generation are particularly vulnerable to the challenges they encounter in life, often more so than previous generations. While we may be tempted to focus on their weaknesses, we must acknowledge our responsibility to help and mentor them. Some of the key challenges and needs that warrant further study include the following:

1.  Emotional needs:

While it may seem easy to understand the problems of the students on the surface, it requires a deep and distinctives approach to truly comprehend the unique needs of each individual. All too often, we generalize the challenges faced by young people and fail to grasp the complexities of their individual circumstances.

When asked who best understands their problems, some students cite "parents," while others point to "friends," and some feel that "no one" truly understands them. It is heart-breaking to witness many of them coping with inner turmoil, removed from the knowledge and support of their family and close circles. Perhaps the family environment does not provide a safe space for them to express themselves freely, or our social circles do not offer the necessary security for them to open up.

Many of these young students lose the sense of identity, self-esteem, contentment, acceptance, and connections with family while some have the fear of failures and future, disappointments on their performances due to comparisons, etc. They often admit they prefer being alone, yet they are actually afraid of loneliness.

To truly engage and win these students to Christ and add meaning to their lives, we need to be more comprehensive in our approach to meet their emotional needs. They need attention from someone who can truly connect with them and understand them. Many of them also admit that they ‘want' understanding graduate or family members to connect with them and understand them.

As the Scripture tells us “A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot” (Proverbs 14:30), emotional stability is essential to healthy mind, and body. As a sibling, or a graduate, are we willing to take these extra steps to be their friend to understand and mentor them without judgement and prejudice?

2.  Physical needs:

Another area that most 'spiritual mentors' overlook is the physical needs of their students. Many students often admit to not having their needs met due to family and other constraints. Too often, we are overly focused on their spiritual life and neglect the physical requirements of these students, such as finance, health, and other lifestyle factors that significantly impact their emotional and spiritual well-being.

As a believing community in Christ, we have a responsibility to care for the physical needs of those among us who are in need. The Scripture tells us in Hebrews 13:16 that we should "not neglect to do good and to share what you have, for such sacrifices are pleasing to God." We can take practical steps to help ensure healthy lifestyles for these young people, and our small acts of kindness can make a significant difference in their lives, which is also pleasing in the sight of God.

3.  Educational needs:

The choice of education and career is a critical area that needs to be addressed for young students. Many students lack a clear vision in life due to a lack of proper guidance in their educational and career choices. Many young students seek additional guidance beyond their academic curriculum. Regrettably, some have chosen the wrong academic path, despite having a different vision. Many have expressed regret over their educational journey, as it did not align with their desired path in life.

As mentors and guides to students, we must take measures to help and properly guide them in pursuing their academic and career goals. This calls for various professionals to engage in mentoring these young, upcoming individuals. This involves significant effort, but we can be confident that it will bear substantial fruit, as Proverbs 9:9 assures us: "Give instruction to a wise man, and he will become wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning."

4.     Spiritual Needs:

Of course, the most essential need in the world is spiritual—a right relationship with God. When spiritual righteousness is achieved, other aspects of life tend to fall into place. As discussed earlier, one of the greatest challenges these young people face is spiritual dryness. Their personal relationships with God are in a fragile state; many admit that their prayer lives and Scripture meditation are nearly non-existent. Although they regularly attend fellowship and church, their personal spiritual lives still require careful attention.

When asked about their prayer concerns, they often identify their spiritual needs as a top priority, acknowledging their struggles. It is encouraging that they are aware of these weaknesses and recognize the need for support. They need someone willing to ‘spend time’ with them—someone who will pray, read Scripture, guide their Bible study, listen to their experiences, and truly care about their spiritual well-being for the long term.

These young people need ongoing spiritual guidance grounded in the teaching of Scripture. As 2 Timothy 3:16-17 (ESV) reminds us, “All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.” Our calling is to continuously teach, correct, and train in righteousness, so that they may be complete and ready for good works. Spiritual fulfilment paves the way for meeting other needs in their lives.

Students – Response

After reading the above, do you now think you need help? You likely do! Yet, perhaps you're still hesitant or afraid to seek support. The Bible encourages us to ask for help when we need it: “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” (James 1:5). Wisdom is a gift from God, granted freely to those who seek it.

As students in need of guidance, it’s essential to acknowledge your weaknesses and be open about your challenges and needs. Often, there are people ready to listen and support, but students hold back, unwilling to share their struggles. This reluctance can limit the trust and relationship between mentors and students. To truly benefit from help, a student must be genuine, teachable, open-minded, and willing to grow.

Do not let fear hold you back from seeking help. The Bible is filled with stories of individuals who cried out for support and, through their courage, became remarkable figures. Remember, seeking help is not a mark of weakness but a sign of strength, for only the wise and strong acknowledge their weaknesses and struggles. By seeking guidance, you demonstrate humility and a desire to grow. Let this strength push you forward, embracing the wisdom and transformation that come from being open to others’ guidance and to God’s wisdom.

Conclusion: It's all about willingness

We all need mentors in our lives, and each of us has the potential to become one if we are willing to seek help and commit to personal growth. Mentors, like everyone else, face countless challenges, and mentoring is not about having all the answers or being free of struggles. Instead, it’s about two people—both with their own struggles—lifting each other up.

Are we willing to sacrifice our comfort, time, and resources to engage with young students? Are we prepared to grow spiritually, emotionally, and in our everyday lives to help those in need? Are we ready to spend time with them, understand their challenges, stand by them in times of need, and guide them to live a life that honours God?

Jesus calls us to be the light, a light that shines in the darkness. You might feel that your efforts are small or ineffective, but know that your life has purpose and impact when you live it with intention. Let your light shine, as Matthew 5:16 urges: “In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”

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References:

1.  McKnight, Tim; Engaging Generation Z: Raising the Bar for Youth Ministry; Crossway Bibles; USA, 2001

2.  UESI; Mentoring; E-booklet; 2024

3.  Survey on the EU students’ lives and needs in Phek district; 2024